People, like, change over time.
They change over time living constantly in, like…
Like, anguish and anger and whatever \u2014 you change who you are, you know?
Anguish and anger.
Whatever it is, it changes you.
Because it\u2019s been so long being like that, you really forget \u2014
like, you forget what it\u2019s like to just be\u2026 without that stuff.<\/p>\n
But all of that can come back. You can, like, come back.
That stuff can return.
That\u2019s what I did.<\/p>\n
And while I was that messed-up person…
I got painted that way \u2014 because she painted me that way, you see?
When we were both here.
And that\u2019s what people don\u2019t get.
They just see the surface.
They see someone this big
hitting someone that small.
Or someone that small hitting someone this big \u2014 you get it?
She\u2019s just a star.<\/p>\n
But yeah. I\u2019ll never forgive myself.<\/p>\n
But what you\u2019re asking is \u2014 are we like that?
Like I said, there\u2019s no excuse.
No man should ever lay a hand on a woman.
But it\u2019s not meant to be told the way she tells it.<\/p>\n
And I don\u2019t think I\u2019ll talk much more about this, but it\u2019s like that Egg Stereo thing I told you.
I\u2019m not gonna give a fuck to anyone.<\/p>\n
It fucks me up, bro.
I could probably be way more chill about all that shit.
Exactly.
These are pathological things, okay?
I\u2019m not being dramatic to be a dick, you know?<\/p>\n
So you were…
I\u2019m not doing this to hurt anyone, you know?
I\u2019m not doing this to hurt.
I\u2019m not.<\/p>\n
I know, like, I hear you.
And if I were the type to make a scene, like,
get all affected by your emotion, like,
PTSD-style, in a negative way \u2014
I wouldn\u2019t even be here talking to you.<\/p>\n
You know?
I wouldn\u2019t have stayed here listening.
I wouldn\u2019t have spent half an hour
listening to you drop your 20 things
without saying a word, without being able to
share my pain too.
To also share with you my pain.
That I feel too.<\/p>\n
The pain you feel, like, being excluded \u2014
the first thing you said, the explosion \u2014
feeling like you\u2019re the black sheep, nobody likes you,
everyone whispers about you
in a group where you\u2019re supposed to belong.<\/p>\n
In some outside group, exactly.
I had to learn to not give a fuck about that.
Exactly \u2014 I felt that too.<\/p>\n
But I forgave myself for that paranoia.
The dogs were making me think people were looking at me that way.<\/p>\n
A group of people.
A big-ass group.
That were, like, a lot of my friends \u2014 people I met through her.<\/p>\n
So imagine \u2014
so many people you liked, so many connections,
looking at you like you’re this kind of person.<\/p>\n
Now you\u2019re like a little egg, my brother.
I\u2019ll try not to edit.
It\u2019s pretty much in the name.
I\u2019ll try not to make it about me, because there\u2019s…<\/p>\n
I can\u2019t believe it happened.
Channeling. Another healer. Look, cool.<\/p>\n
And now you\u2019ll have to feel…
Now you\u2019ll have to feel what I\u2019m sending you.<\/p>\n
You\u2019re being, like…
Oh my God.
Oh my God.<\/p>\n
Yeah. I\u2019m focused on all the pain you sent me.
Now I\u2019m going to the other side. Wait, you good?
Whoa, your heart, wow. Okay.
I think it\u2019s the other side.
That side \u2014 the right one.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
People, like, change over time.They change over time living constantly in, like…Like, anguish and anger and whatever \u2014 you change who you are, you know?Anguish and anger.Whatever it is, it changes you.Because it\u2019s been so long being like that, you really forget \u2014like, you forget what it\u2019s like to just be\u2026 without that stuff. But […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"parent":364,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","template":"","meta":{"pagelayer_contact_templates":[],"_pagelayer_content":"","footnotes":""},"class_list":["post-92","page","type-page","status-publish","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/92","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/page"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=92"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/92\/revisions"}],"up":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/pages\/364"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/variasvadias.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=92"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}